Memory 3


>*You completly forgot that they would get back eventually.*

>Amaryllis: Gods, are you ok??

>*You can't even imagine how you must look. You can barely see yourself in the mirror, and you aren't sure how long it's been since you started crying.*

<Descant: I...

>*You start to cut more of the lock of hair you're holding.*

>Tycho: No no no, Descant stop that.

>*He comes over and takes the knife from your hand, the hair falling to the floor.*

>You are like an inch from slicing your chin off...We have scissors, you know.

>*Amaryllis walks over and puts her hands on your shoulders.*

>Amaryllis: Are you...

>*You look over to her. Gods, what were you thinking?*

>...No, no you aren't.

>*She brings you in for a hug. You still aren't used to the physical contact, but right now it feels comforting.*

>Grab me some chairs, please.

>*They sit you down in the chair. Why are they trying to help you? Shouldn't they hate you?*

>*When you get settled in the chair, you feel Chrominance and Jevil hop up to your lap. Amaryllis sits in another chair and keeps you in her arms.*

<Descant: S...sorry...

>*You don't know what to say. You don't know how to stop crying. You're being a burden on them.*

>Amaryllis: It's ok, you've done nothing wrong.


>What's going on?

>*You just shake your head. They'll just get mad as soon as you say anything.*

>Shh hey...

>*She draws you in more, gently rubbing your back. You bury your head in her shoulder. She softy sings, a song you haven't heard in years, but know instantly. The two of you loved it. You pick up your part on instinct.*

>*It takes awhile, but you gradually feel your breathing steady. You hug Amaryllis back. You didn't realize how much you missed things like this.*


>Amaryllis: You're allowed to talk to us, it might help you feel better. We won't judge you or anything.

<Descant:...O-or get mad...?

>Amaryllis: Of course not.

>*You hesitate for a moment. Was she being honest...? Would it even help?*

<...I guess it's...worth a shot.

<Descant: It's...

<I feel...I feel bad for everything I did. I-I went up there and....and I told everyone how-how great things were and how n-nothing was wrong, this is the way things should be. I-I didn't question it at all, didn't think about...anyone but me and everyone else in the H-Hall...There was a reason they were in power, they knew what was best. B-but Gods they didn't. They...T-they didn't even care about me more than they had to. They didn't even really l-listen to me, or talk to me more than t-they had to, except to chastise me for...who knows what.

<And I...I haven't left the Main Hall in y-years, and I-I was always told it was dangerous for me because I'd be a good target for a-attacks and things like that. So it's it's kind of scary being o-out and about like this. I-It's been hard to adjust to...

<A-and the more I saw myself in the mirror the-the more I just...hated how I looked. I never liked the long hair, I-I just did it because e-everyone said it looked better but it's awful I hate it so I-I...

>Tycho:...Went at it with a knife?

<Descant:...It was the first thing I found.

<...T-that's...I think that's e-everything.

>*There's a brief silence. You brace yourself for whatever they're about to say.*

>Amaryllis: Oh, Descant--

>Tycho: None of us blame you, you know.

>*You and Amaryllis look over at where Tycho is standing. You weren't expecting that from him of all people.*


>Tycho: It's not your fault.

>You just...I'll be honest, I didn't trust you much when you first got here.

<Why would you?

> obviously didn't know what was going on. Like you said, you never even left the Main Hall. You probably barely heard anything that happened outside other than what they wanted you to hear.

>It...sounds like they didn't treat you very well there. You're just as much a victim as any of the rest of us.

>*He walks over and places a hand on your shoulder.*

>If anything, the fact that you're regretting it so much tells me that you've at least learned something.

<Descant:...I wish I could change it.

>Tycho:...Maybe now you can help us.

<Can I really...?

>Amaryllis: And you're under good protection here. Nobody around here will hurt you.

>Besides, you live with a couple of pretty skilled fighters if anyone does try anything.

>*She laughs a little as she grips you tighter. You can't help but smile a little too.*

>We can help you adjust however we can. It's..probably not easy after so long in there.

<Descant:...Thank you.

<I...I think I'm doing a little better now.

>*You take a look in the mirror. The side of your hair looks like a mess, uneven with damaged ends. You exhale a small laugh.*

<...Gods, I've really gone and ruined my hair, huh?

>Amaryllis: It's nothing a little trim won't fix.

<Descant: How am I supposed to hide the parts I cut?

>*You attempt to part your hair in a way to have some of the longer bits from one side over the mess on the other. It still doesn't look good, but...*

>Amaryllis:...I mean, I was thinking we just cut the rest off. You said you didn't like it.

<Descant: I mean...Yeah.

<But that...might've just been me not thinking clearly. It's probably just--

>Tycho: You don't have to be a girl you know.

>*You and Amaryllis look over to him again, really confused. Well, you are at least. It's only a second later Tycho seems to realize that probably wasn't the best way to word that. He clears his throat awkwardly.*

>I'm just...saying. Some of what you said sounded...

>...Kinda familiar, is all.

>Something to think about.


>*You look back at the mirror.*

<Descant:...I'll do the haircut, at least.

>*Amaryllis immediately gets to work. Apparently, fixing impromptu haircuts are a thing she does a lot. It doesn't feel like too long before she tells you that shes done.*

>Amaryllis: I just kinda went with where you had started to cut it, but we can always go shorter if you--

<Descant: No, this is...

<...This is good.

>*You give a small smile as you look your short, curly bob that she's given you.*

>*...Maybe things will be ok.*

[End memory.]